Fucked.

This'll probably end up being a rant; I have no idea where i'm going with this.

I've gone through a lot of different e.d's. I've been anorexic, bulimic, and a binge eater. I've said before, each time I pass into a new phase, I can't remember the last one. Well, I've started binging again, have been for the last week. And really, I almost hate it as much as purging. The feeling of loss of control, not being able to stop even when your past the point of just being full. God, How do I stop this again? I've gone through it before, but I don't think it was this bad! I just want my normality back.

Maybe I'm exaggerating though..I tend to do that. I think I did that with my anorexia, especially since it turns out I'm an inch and  a half shorter than I thought it was. Reading other peoples stories, maybe I wasn't anorexic, but wannarexic. I was underweight though, and I was restraining a lot.

But maybe this will stop. How though? Can anyone help me? Has this happened to you? It just started this last week. I was doing soo good too. I hate going backwards! I fucking HATE it.

But I guess that's part of life, aint it.